Toast can make one anxious or nervous if not practiced in advance, so like any speech to be given in public, we always encourage those making the toast to be prepared and avoid "winging" their remarks. The toast maker needs to recognize that his/her remarks are to offer congratulations to the couple. They may be humorous or touching or congratulatory. Whichever is chosen, they need to be given in good taste.
Who may toast.
- The father of the bride proposes the first toast to his daughter and future son-in-law at the engagement party.
- The host or the father of the groom proposed the first toast to the bride and groom at the rehearsal party.
- The best man proposed the first toast to the bride and groom at the wedding reception. After the best man has completed his toast, everyone except the bride and the groom rise and drink to it.
After the best man's toast, the groom usually responds with thanks to his best man and a toast or two of his own - to the bride, to his parents, to his new in-laws. If the bride wishes she may then rise and offer her own toast to her husband and/or to her new family.
Other members of the wedding party may then propose additional toasts if they wish.
All guest present (except the person being toasted) should raise their glasses to each toast.
At the end of the toasts, the best man may read aloud any congratulatory telegrams or letters or emails sent by absent friends and relatives.
If one has no idea where to start, we suggest finding a marriage related quote around which an appropriate toast may be built. THE OXFORD DICTIONARY OF QUOTATIONS, is a good place to start, as is a careful search of web pages that specialize in wedding appropriate toasts.
One of our favorites is the Apache wedding blessing.
"Now you will feel no rain, for each of you will be shelter for the other.
Now you will feel no cold, for each of you will be warmth for the other.
Now there will be no loneliness, for each of you will be a companion to the other.
Now you are two persons, but there is only one life before you.
May beauty surround you both in the journey ahead and through all the years.
May happiness be your companion and your days together be good and long upon the earth."
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